should i continue this?!?

i’m god damn nervous!

at this moment, im dwelling with my dilemma. i participated in a public speaking contest in our college, the thing i mentioned days ago. i had memorized my chosen piece and attended with some guts and some hesitation at the venue.

before the competition began, participants were slowly gathered and nervousness filled me at my very seat, i’m actually asking myself that time why i went there(and i realized, the thing they call “palabra de honor”) i went there not to satisfy my thirst for some competition, but only because i said so.

i’m at shock when i found out that the organizers of the said contest gave the piece to memorize, for some uniformity i guess. they told me if i can write my piece, which was actually i don’t want to do.

i was the second performer and i finished my piece with confidence, i haven’t missed any part and i know i delivered it the way my mentors way back in highschool told me so.

but after some good and powerful performance of my competitors, i doubt myself. some of them did a declamation and not an oration, but during the assessment of the final 7 i was at the spot number 5.

i should be thankful with what i achieved today, but after the deliberation, i became dubious. scared. and i almost felt some nervous break. (exaggerated huh?)

i cannot remember when was the last time i felt this kind of thing in me. now, the finals would be just 3 days from now. i’m at hesitation. what should i do?!

better end this entry, because kuya jv texted me to go back at the COC to get the original piece.

“do you think i can memorize that in just 3 days?”

i do hope so.